Are You Sabotaging Your Online Networking?
15 years of business networking - including two online - means that ONLE Networking co-founder James West knows how to get results from online events and the surefire ways to sabotage your online networking.
Since the first lockdown, many networking groups have scrambled to recreate a face-to-face model in the digital world. Fortunately for us at ONLE Networking we’d already been running networking online for 18-months so we’d already gone past the teething problems into the ‘get-value-from-the-medium’ stage. This means I’ve got a strong grasp of the key differences between online and offline networking and I also understand how easy it is for bad habits to creep in when we’re sat in front of a computer screen.
Bad habits
Now, I’m not talking about unseen PJ bottoms, snoring dogs and the next door neighbour’s lawn mower. This is about making a conscious decision to commit wholeheartedly to a different (not better or worse) way of networking.
Some are still stuck in the mindset that online networking is just a poor substitute for face-to-face events, choosing to ‘wait it out’ as those few weeks turn into months. However, unless you too embrace the change, you may find yourself sabotaging your networking strategy - exasperating rather than mitigating the obvious disadvantages of not meeting in-person.
I’ve learnt more about how people behave at business networking events in the past six months than I did in the previous 15 years attending face-to-face. Online networking presents us with a picture of how people behave in business that we’ve NEVER had before. As each person becomes a stacked up a thumbnail image on my screen, I can observe everyone in the room at all times. I’m building a mental checklist of the words and actions being said that engage the audience – as well as what NOT to do.
You’re Just Not ‘In The Room’
Whether I’m talking or listening, I’m checking to see who’s paying attention. I can see who is disengaged, subtly trying to check their phone. I can see those who are not even bothering to hide the fact they are not listening. If this is you - turn off your phone, close your other screens and give your fellow attendees the attention and respect they deserve.
We all lead busy lives, and it can be easy to book yourself in back-to-back before and after your networking meeting - but give yourself some breathing space. Take a moment to prepare yourself and your space beforehand. Check the attendee list and have everything in front of you that you’re going to need.
Had You Forgotten? You Are ALWAYS Communicating
When anticipating our turn to speak, we are mentally preparing, ready to passionately convey our message when the mic comes up. But it’s easy to forget that we are always visible during online networking events. What you do when you are not speaking tells other attendees a lot about what kind of person you are.
Listen - and demonstrate you are listening. If you only engage when you are speaking and you are clearly doing other things when others are speaking, the message you are sending is clear:
“I want you to listen to what I’m saying. But I have zero interest in what you have to say.”
Not a good way to begin a relationship is it?
Look - I get it. It’s REALLY hard to listen to everyone AND smile AND be fully engaged, looking into your webcam for the entire meeting. Doing so is not realistic and would look weird. However, if you’re bothering to attend a networking meeting, make sure you’re making a good impression. Show people that you care - smile and nod when others are talking. I guarantee they will notice and will be more likely to listen to you when you speak or during any subsequent conversations with them.
Here’s My Plan…
Most of the advice I read about networking tells you to prepare. Some tell you to look up the people who you are going to meet and draw up a list of who you want to speak to.
I couldn’t disagree with this advice more strongly!
I fully endorse having a clear value proposition and preparing your introduction. I would even suggest going into a networking meeting knowing what you need help with, what an ideal referral/connection is and perhaps even with the name of a person or business you’d like to be connected with - but that should be the extent of your agenda.
James West, ONLE Networking
“I Just Want THEM”
In my experience, those that research their fellow attendees to draw up a ‘hitlist’ of who they want to speak to are cultivating the wrong mindset. Those with a strict agenda get tunnel vision; they become goal orientated. They want the sale and so they often come across as selfish. It also leads to what I describe as ‘networking Guess Who’. This is the practice of ignoring the people you have assumed are of no use to you (slapping down their Guess Who tile in the process), leaving just two or three pre-selected ‘hot leads’. You then pursue these connections and because you clearly have an agenda, you often scare them off. Suddenly, you’ve slapped down every tile on the board and leave the networking event complaining that it was a waste of your time. NEVER assume the value or importance of people that you meet based on their job title or business type.
“They can’t do anything for me”
I’ve met amazing networkers who have zero employees and hardly any turnover. I’ve also encountered brilliant networkers employed by networking marketing businesses. And I’ve met exceptional networkers who are just starting out and have no money to spend.
Similarly, I’ve met dreadful networkers who - on paper - should be highly valuable. However, in reality they are selfish, disinterested and contribute nothing. An individual’s job title/business category/status doesn’t tell you what kind of networker they are. Also remember, you don’t know who that person knows, who they are married to, who their best friend is. They might sell a product that you have no use for, but they might be wealthy enough to spend freely to support others in their network.
A good networker is a people person, a connector. They listen, help and are the ones who get the most value from networking. So while the nuances of networking online have changed and we need to alter our approach accordingly, the basics of being interested, unselfish and a positive contributor to networking is just as important and powerful as it’s ever been.
Want more tips about online networking? Watch episode 5 of the ONLE Podcast.
